Do you ever focus so much on your failures that you can’t see your successes? I get that way a lot, so this weekend I decided to throw a ton of guitars at that feeling to see if it would get any better. And it did! Originally I conceived of this song as a list of minor successes that might offset bigger failures. Not only did this turn out to be a boring narrative device, but it made me even more conscious of the feeling that had driven me to write this song in the first place. Looking at a rough list that included successes like “I found the place in the car where I hid the money” and “I discovered the discount bread rack at Stop & Shop” was frustrating, and it reminded me of how broke I am. So I went in a different direction. I shot for imagery, and I asked questions about where God has gone off to when you feel like you can’t get anything right. I feel that the resulting song is my most recent success. So to my feelings of inadequacy I say “be damned!” I, and we, and you are capable of things! Isn’t that good?
lyrics
If you shut the engines down
Wouldn’t you know
You won’t be starting them up
Turn this thing around
No, I don’t think so
I haven’t given enough
I think I might have been asleep
Likely dreaming of land
Every single night
I reach for my conscience
Like I’m making a plan
I could spend the year in bed
Give up the fight and lose my edge
Tell me that’s shit
And I don’t mind
One of these days I’m bound to find
A way out
God forbid a man forgives himself
No, he’s holding it close
If he’d done all them right things
Maybe he’d be different
He’d be rid of the ghost
If he’d done all the right things
Talking ‘bout a peace of mind he’d never forget
If he did all them good things
Baby, he’d be drowning in a sea of regret
Thinkin’ I’ll be a human being
An American man
A Jesus freak
Burning bridges
right on time
Success aint cheap
It’s hard to find
A way out
God? Are you there?
You’re probably working behind the scenes
You could be hiding anywhere
And maybe we’re free to do as we please
Maybe we’re lost out at sea
Hoisting hearts up the mast into the breeze