This weekend my family gathered in North Carolina for the funeral of my grandfather. I was not there with them, having chosen to keep previous plans. It was strange to be apart from that event, knowing that my family was engaged in the important process of honoring Granddaddy, and seeing him off to whatever comes next. Granddaddy was a minister, and when I last visited him this past summer, I saw what a fixture he was in his community. In my imagination, the church was packed for him on the day of his funeral.
My thoughts have returned to him in mundane circumstances and quiet moments since I found out he was nearing the end. I have found myself in my own spaces, wondering how he would interpret and contextualize my sphere; my neighborhood, my social circle, my work, my city. We've been very different men, with very different lives, but I think we have both been driven by a desire to feel part of something bigger, and to engage in the pursuit of a greater good. I wrote this song about those passing ponderings, and the quiet moments when I've looked for him.
lyrics
It's only a question
Why do I turn away
Everyone notices
When you've got little to say
Everyone feels for you
Patching up the crack in your wall
Remember he stood above you
He stood about twenty feet tall
And God's known to work
In mysterious ways
And I think man does too
I stand by the window
And watch the neighbors parking their cars
I count up the fangs around them
I tally up their scrapes and their scars
And some people feel for you
Like it isn't anything at all
Remember he stood above you
He stood about twenty feet tall
And God's known to work
In mysterious ways
And I think man does too