On friday my family received some bad news, and it shook me. I was already in a bit of a state, nervously trying to secure the last of my graduate school recommendations, but the news that my grandmother had fallen gravely ill -- and that my father was rushing to her side in Georgia -- put me over the edge. By the evening I was crawling out of my skin and I went for a dark dark walk. I walked out of the bright town center and intended to remain on the main roads where streetlights could provide me with a sense of security. Instead I veered seemingly against my will onto a darkened bicycle path that lead me deep into the woods, and far away from anything familiar. I was alone in the dark, colored Christmas lights vaguely visible through the trees, with only my agitated state to keep me company. That night the woods were haunted and I was surrounded. When I got home I wrote this song. It is about willingly veering out of safe territory. It is about the lack of control we have over the fates of the people in our lives. It also has shades of the Newtown Massacre which hasn’t been far from my thoughts since it happened. On friday night I didn’t want to feel safe, because it didn’t feel like an honest place to be. My family is doing a good job of making it feel like Christmas, but I wish my father was here, and I wish my grandmother wasn’t in so much pain. I don’t wish to be a downer on Christmas, so I tried to funnel these feelings into an exciting, kinetic rock song. I really do like this one.


I sincerely hope your home is warm, your loved ones are safe and close, and all is well. To those of you who observe the holiday, Merry Christmas!